RANDOM

Hi guys,right now the champions league final is on,i sat and watched the first half and i must give myself an award for that,not that i don’t like football but the tension that comes with it i just cannot bear,so i prefer doing something else and just run in to jubilate when a goal is scored.

I have learnt a lot of things about myself this past few weeks,and i believe this is a process for me to discover myself,i thought before coming to Milan that i could say boldly that this is me,but each day i keep seeing a new side,attitudes i need to drop,pick-up or strengthen.

Had bible study on Thursday and the discussion was on faith,God really did open my eyes to a lot of things,i pray for the strength to trust Him and believe what He says.

I decided staying alone in my room was so not good for me so i went to stay with friends at the AFRICAN EMBASSY- yes we have an embassy here in Milan,will write a post on the them later on.

Hillsong London came to Milan last Friday,it was an enjoyable time in God’s presence with praise and worship,i never knew i could jump like that,really enjoyed myself.

I am learning to ride a bike,it was nice the first day,my instructor actually told me i was doing good.Now don’t laugh at me,no time is too late to start and i guess i was afraid of falling that was why i never learnt.Learning how to play the guitar is my next on my list.

Overall,in every situation i have found myself,i am learning to come out of it a better person.

Can still hear the screaming from those watching the football match,the second half is about to end,it was 1-1 at the end of the first half.don’t know which side has won or if it will go into penalty (that is exactly why i cannot stand the game).Well i will have to wait for someone to come tell me,everyone moved to a neighbour's flat to watch.

See you later

CIAO

YES!!!    Someone just walked in and said Barcelona won three goals to one,I am so happy,i am not a fan of Man U nor of Barcelona but i follow Thierry Henry where ever he goes,not that i know where he is now,but you get my drift right.

JUST THINKING

I think i have shed every tear that can come out of my eyes,the next thing is to wait and see what God has in store for me,because right now i do not seriously have any understanding of the direction in which my life is taking.

I have spoken and thought positively as i can but things just seem to be spiralling downward and at a very fast rate.I can’t for the life of me understand why i have to go through this. At this point in my life i am not even thinking or aspiring to be great,just to get by is what i want now.A friend says that things are always the toughest just before dawn,well i don’t know if i believe that any more.

Going for bible study tonight and we are actually going to discuss about faith.I have told myself i will not contribute today,just sit down and listen cause seriously I don’t even know if i can say anything with certainty.

Yeah,I know you might say here she comes again with her pity party,but the truth is i really needed to let out what i have been feeling for the past few days and my blog was just the best way for me to do it.As i am writing now ,i think of it as my journal and that no one is reading this post,because seriously i have to release this pent up emotion somewhere.

You might say prayer,but right now i can’t even bring myself to do that,every atom of strength and faith i seem to have lost,maybe bible study will help today.

Why do i have to be in this situation,seriously why?

WOMEN’S RETREAT

Hi there,just got back from the Milan Area Women’s Retreat,it is a retreat organized by the International Church of Milan once every year.The theme of this years retreat was ‘LORD,TEACH US TO PRAY’.
We had been told to save the date of the retreat as far back as December last year,so we had a lot of time to get prepared for it,even at that time i was not sure if i would be able to make it for the retreat but God was working and i was there.

HELLO EVERYONE

Hi everyone,its been a long time i know,sorry about that.Life is a road, you can never tell what lies ahead,a curve,a T-junction,a roundabout ,an animal running into the street,you are not even sure of  fellow road users etc,the only thing you pray for, is that when you get to such moments,that you make the right decision and you are ready for it.Been feeling low for a while and just really could not bring myself to blog,i had a lot of questions on my mind,things i believed in i started to doubt,it just seemed like i was losing my mind,its kind of hard cause you put up a front before family and friends yet you are dying silently,i now begin to understand what goes on in the mind of people who have committed suicide.

I was going through some of the blogs i visit and i saw something funny,Neefemi of Diary of an Unpaid Intern had a post titled’ TELL GOD’ and the very first lines of the post were ‘Someone needs to tell God –I AM NOT JOB'.I found it funny but at the same time totally understood where she was coming from,i have come to those areas in my life road that i mentioned above and i will just say it is the grace of God that is holding me up.

For most of the bible study and Sunday sermons i have discussed and heard from my pastor here in Milan,there is one verse that keeps reoccurring and that is Rom 8: 28 ‘ And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God,to those who are the called according to His purpose’.It may be tough right now,the future does not seem clear,everything is not going according to plan but i know this one thing ‘the steps of the righteous are ordered by God'.In all this i have learnt to be fully dependent on God, and He has not disappointed me,just when you think ,this is the end He steps in right on time.I know this is a learning phase for me and i want to come out as gold,truth be told i asked for this,but like they say be careful what you ask for.

Last two Sundays my pastor while preaching said for us to take this three phrases with us this year as it pertains our relationship with God and what he can do in our lives.

• Is anything too hard for God ?
• Is God’s power limited?
• All things are possible with God .

He was preaching about Gideon and how God lead him to victory against the Midianites,one thing struck me during the message ,when God shows up in your situation you will have no doubt that it is Him and not your own strength also that impossible situations are God’s specialty.

I live each day with the knowledge that God is on my side.

This is not the post i initially  set out to write ,i just said to myself that i would say a few word about why i have been MIA,but this is what came out,i actually had something that i was angry about to write on,but i think you need to voice out issues in order to clear them from your system.While i had been quiet on my blog,i had often wondered what event would make me blog again,that i will write about in my next post.

Thanks to all who encouraged me by leaving  comments on my blog.When i started this blog i never intended to have people read it talk more of having followers but you all have been wonderful.Thank you.

CIAO

,

NOW

I am hanging on by a thread,my footing is so unsure.